Often couples find themselves debating over whether they want to stay or leave. The reason are contextual and all of them would have many personal reasons for being in this confused state. There are a few researches that say that married and dating couples both gave similar answers when asked why they wanted to break up or stay in the relationship.
Why Married And Dating Couples End Up in This Confused State?
There is no one apparent reason. There can be multiple reasons for why one partner might start feeling like they want to leave. However, the prevalent cases are the ones where the person feels confused about whether they should stay or leave. This inability to decide is described as painful because the partner continuously feels as if he/she is betraying the other. However, if you feel this way about your partner, we have some suggestions for you.
Since there can be multiple reasons why a partner starts feeling this way, they can either be positive or negative. Sometimes the reasons for staying are negative and the reasons for leaving are positive. However, it can be the other way round as well. These suggestions should help you decide which one, staying or leaving, would be the right decision.
Most people end up feeling this way because they lose their own identities in a relationship. This results in them losing track of their core values. Both the partners become so interlinked with each other that they become a third person in the relationship. This is because they don’t know what they want for themselves or have started to ignore what they want. This is why they snap sometimes and want to leave because they want to stop giving. However, it is more desirable to go back and start analyzing your core values. Decide what kind of a relationship you want and what do you need from your partner. If you don’t know what you want, then you’re doing nothing but projecting your emotional instability onto your partner. Once you have reanalyzed your own self, you will know what to do.
Analyze Your Reasons
If you can’t decide if you should break up or not, then it would be better to start analyzing why you want to break up. The best thing to do is to communicate them with your partner. Once you’ve communicated, you might begin to realize that they’re not big enough reason or even if they are, something can be done about them. You can start working on the challenges and improve yourself and your partner as well.
Talk to Your Partner About It
If you’re at the verge of breaking up but there’s a small part of your brain telling you to reconsider then all you need to do is sit down with your partner and talk to them about your concerns and whatever there is that makes you feel doubtful and start the recovery journey.